Dealing With Emotions

I used to want to be a singer when I was young. I would sing in the shower for hours and practice in the mirror with my good ol hairbrush. I had an amazing vocal coach when I was around 11. I remember he and I remember loving singing with her. I remember hitting a note once that was so beautiful that I actually remember it. Sometimes I think what could have been if I had stuck at it, but I didn’t.

Life just gets in the way sometimes you know and I didn’t have pushy parents. I used to watch every musical under the sun and always see myself on a stage. I nearly went to stage school but didn’t quite make it. Its funny with my acting and musical career everything else seemed to come before it. I think its because it was so important to me that I couldn’t face the heartbreak of it not going well. I know I had potential though, I was told many times but I literally felt myself give up on it. Its like it dried up. I still sing now but just for myself and to myself. I recorded a little album with a friend and that helped me get some of it out of my system. I remember hearing a Woman say once on one of those shows “don’t let me die with this music still in me”. It was such a powerful thing to say and I could relate to it so much.

Its quite sad in a way to feel that I didn’t have the courage to actually foll

ow my dream. Many say that you know its not over and I get that. Of course, you can re-pick up a dream at any point but I think we can go past our prime and lets face it, the world favors the young. Even so, I am sure its possible to pick up a dream and I am not sure a person is truly happy until they at least acknowledge their dreams. If I could go back in time would I do things differently? I kind of want to say no because I don’t really want to have any regrets but then I think maybe I would go back to the time where I kind of threw in the towel and I would pick it up again and at least try and if it didn’t work then what did I lose, nothing! Anything good and worthwhile takes practice and effort and most of all patience and persistence, especially with trial and error. Anyway, I am grateful for that which I have been a part of in my life so far musically and theatrically and it will always be something I remember.

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